ALL IN MEMORY OF WASTED OPPORTUNITIES.

Photo by Malcolm Lightbody on Unsplash

“What is the one thing you enjoy doing even without pay?” Dad had posed that question. I weaselled away from the conversation pretending to get myself a cup of espresso as I tried to escape his question because that would mean having a long conversation of a future I was not sure about. At the back of my mind, however, I wrestled with the reality that I had left a dream unfinished.

By deciding to join the rat race makes me no better than the existing baby boomers who had to give up on their dream for a chance to survive to feed their families and a whole generation, paying taxes, acquiring loans to have more loans- mortgages, buying land etc., and paying more taxes.

“You know getting a paycheck every day makes you a slave to employment?” he continued bashing me with the truth-something I was clearly avoiding to hear.

I can start my own company you know. Maybe a peanut shop, or create brands for organizations. Perhaps I could be an events coordinator or a strategist.”

“Yes, you should. You do not want to end up like me, working till you retire. Even then your pension is not worth your survival. Take risks now that you are still young. Fall and get up quickly. Be smart Val!”

Okay…truth is I do not understand how the Zuckerberg’s of our times could make crazy decisions that made them the billionaires we desire to become. Or how one can decide to leave school and get to a land that is no way comfortable so as to create a company worth Kenya’s debt to China.

Photo by Simon Maage on Unsplash

I have thrived in the land of procrastinators and I am its queen. The number of times I have left a project halfway or given a thought about an idea is pretty amazing. Or maybe it is my guilty pleasure of instant gratification (millennials and Gen Z’s can relate) that is making me give up on the road of becoming a trillionaire.

I try so hard to escape the slavery yet I struggle finding it badly, to a point it hurts.

Welcome to the world of arrested development. You struggle with employment yet you envy the lives of digital nomads. Maybe the hardest thing about life is the ability to choose because it will have a consequence. One part has to be affected even though we lie to ourselves that we are super masters at multi-tasking. The lies… (Sigh).

So sure, I do not know what to do with my life yet. Worse is I am getting further and further from being young. Just a few years ago I was a teenager, full of dreams and wasted chances. Now, I should be happy with the achievements I have had since then, but I still struggle with a rat race that I unintentionally joined. Now, I grind and work hard without really knowing its outcome. I have unintentionally joined the world of zombies and discombobulated humans. But the words of my wise man still haunts me…

“Yes, you should. You do not want to end up like me, working till you retire. Even then your pension is not worth your survival. Take risks now that you are still young. Fall and get up quickly. Be smart Val!”

All in memory of wasted chances, wild days and crazy life.(sigh…)

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90’s kid. You fall, you get back up. Love is the greatest gift.

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Valerie Odhiambo

Valerie Odhiambo

90’s kid. You fall, you get back up. Love is the greatest gift.

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